my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
My vagina is very pro this idea
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