Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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