my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Randomize
