remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
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