he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
