Grow some girl-balls and come out already
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
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