How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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