Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Randomize
