dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
