Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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