don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
She's the barista slut.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Randomize