Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
Randomize
