Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Randomize