I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
