He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
