ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
she pinky promised me she was 18
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
