Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Randomize