that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
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