I'm laying in your front yard are you home
I can tuck mytits in my pants
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
Come share oat with me in your robe
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
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