Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
The Olympian is in my bed
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