Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
Randomize
