guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Randomize