If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
We have started to decorate penises.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
he just fucked me for my cheese.
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Randomize
