I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Randomize
