brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
