I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
