Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Randomize
