its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize