There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Randomize
