I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize