Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
this will be a night to untag.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Randomize
