How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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