all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
you told grandpa to call you daddy
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Someone came in the potted fern
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
