So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
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