I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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