THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
Let's paint friendship bongs
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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