If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize