I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
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