he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
I will be naked everywhere
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Randomize