i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
You have to summon your inner elephant
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Randomize
