I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
