Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
Ladies, if you have recieved this text then you are one of the lucky few friends I have decided to make this proposal to. As you all know, my boyfriend's birthday is in two weeks and I have finally decided on the perfect present. Surprise threesome. Now, there can only be one, this isn't an orgy you know, so I will be rating the ideal candidates on bra size and sluttyness. Experiance will count, references if available. Inbox me your credentials so we can come to a...Satisfying agreement.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize
