There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
