dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
