don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
