Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
i am craving dick and cupcakes
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
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