ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
My vagina just recognized that song.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
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