I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Randomize
