Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
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