the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
Randomize